The Art of the Miami Bachelor Party

So, you have a friend in the Miami area that is about to be forever (until it becomes inconvenient) joined to another in the holy bonds of holy matrimony and need to plan a suitable prenuptial outing? This can be a tricky balancing act, and requires some skill and forethought in order that it not become an epic debacle. Naturally, the goal is always to have a good time without.a) Offending your friend's sensibilities.b) Boring the soon-to-be-wed to tears.c) Incurring the wrath of the dominant social, political, and religious group to the point that they jail your whole party and send you to reeducation camps.

All of these outcomes can be potentially difficult to avoid, depending on how the evening shapes up. Outfitting all the party members with bullhorns and whiskey while riding around in a van full of strippers might be fun, but you risk the first and third options described above. Then again, a night of peaceful reflection in a mountaintop shrine could possibly evoke the second response.

Ideally, these two scenarios would be combined, with the night spent in a shrine where the meditation is periodically interrupted by bullhorn toting strippers that emerge from the cloister to pour shots of whiskey. Prices for such events are often cost prohibitive, so below I shall discuss some other options.Planning.Planning is really the key step for success in most events, and bachelor(ette) parties are no exception.

First and foremost, plan according to your friend's boundaries (if bride{groom} is a devout Mennonite, you may want to forgo the stripper option). Lately, in a dramatic cultural role-reversal, it has been the women who have the wild parties for the bride-to-be, while the men have quieter, more subdued evenings. You are of course free to abide by whatever stereotypes you choose, but I add a caveat: Parties like these are the most fun when they push at your friend's comfort boundaries a little bit, provided you can do this without shattering them. Momentary discomfort, under the right circumstances, can provide a little adrenaline boost that makes the rest of the evening that much more fun. Under no circumstances should this be taken to mean you get carte blanche to subject the lucky bride(groom) to whatever trials you want.

Nothing ruins an enjoyable evening like prolonged, unrelenting discomfort. Know the limits, and don't tick your friend off before the wedding.Transportation.What I am about to say, I honestly do not say because of my occupation. The best way to get around during a bachelor party is a limousine. Most bachelor(ette) parties move to multiple locations, so you need a good way of moving everyone about en mass.

Miami has quite a few limousine renters, most notably Millenium Limo, and these vehicles make it possible for the party to never stop. It's best to travel in a group, and public transportation is really not the best venue for a loud, obnoxious bachelor party. Given the luxury, convenience, and the fact that split between 10 people, the cost can be about 5 dollars per hour/person, limousines are the way to go. Other options include just staying in the rented hotel room (expensive, lame to just stay there the whole night), carpooling from place to place (have to set up designated drivers and find parking), taxis (expensive, inconvenient, cab drivers give me the willies), but none of the other options have ever been as satisfactory to me.Location.I'm a proponent of the "start low-key and go from there" school of event planning.

Dinner is always a nice departure point, followed perhaps by drinks, a nightclub, and, if desired (it usually is), a "gentleman's(ladies) club." It's also nice to have a room at a hotel to come back to when the party is ready to move to a more permanent location. You should always alert the staff wherever you go to the nature of your party beforehand, as nasty surprises for the management often translates to "get off my property, I'll see you in court" for unlucky patrons. Wherever you decide to go, check the place out first, and make sure it looks like an appropriate venue.

That Personal Touch.Nearing the end of the night, you'll probably be back at a hotel room, or the residence of one of the braver revelers. Be sure the final destination is stocked with some food and drink, as well as entertainment.

As the night is really focused on your friend, make sure you do something special for them, preferably in that "ha-ha-we're-making-fun-but-really-we-love-you" kind of way. All manner of tributes are appropriate, as long as they are neither too insincere nor maudlin (a little maudlin is always appropriate for such occasions).Hopefully you already have some ideas for any hypothetical upcoming parties for bachelor(ette)s that may be in your future.

Good luck, and good drinking/dancing/debauchery.

By: Nick W. Jurkowski